Monday, December 19, 2005

The Christmas Movie as a Source of Confusion.

I have some questions/thoughts elicited by a classic holiday film I saw recently.

1) Do you remember “The Christmas Movie” starring Ralphie, the little boy who wants nothing more than a Red Rider BB gun for Christmas, but everyone tells him that he’ll only shoot his eye out? Well, he didn’t give up on his dream, and even went so far as to suffer rejection by the head honcho, Santa Clause, and still his wish would not die. He persevered and in the end, he finally got his Red Rider BB Gun. Of course, he immediately followed this victory by nearly shooting his eye out… What does this mean? Is there some great cosmic truth here? I don’t know. I’m just thinking out loud, but it seems like something is there. It’s too close to the holidays to think (my 12 days of Christmas have already started. Soon to be followed by some kind of 12 step program I think.) And in truth, my face still hurts a little. I’m aware enough to sense great truth, but not enough to care very much right now.

2) Have you ever noticed that licking something extremely cold is very similar to licking something extremely hot? I hadn’t either, but think about it. I’ll wait until the image of Angelina Jolie has passed from your mind.

Cold: You stick to it, it’s very painful, you probably lose some flesh, and your friends all laugh at you and call you Einstein.

Hot: You stick to it, it’s very painful, you probably lose some flesh, and you smell cooking meat.

I don’t know what this means either, on a cosmic scale, but I can tell you for sure that all other things being equal, I would rather smell meat cooking than have my friends laugh at me. Or, you could just renounce the licking of all things extreme, probably a good policy in any situation. Up to you.

3) Leg shaped lamps are only useful if you want to shed some light and kick some ass at the same time.

4) Never wear more clothes than you can bend your elbows in. Unless your extremely fat. That would look funny.

5) Get rid of those ugly damn birth-control glasses dude. Roy Orbison is dead, you’re a loser, and not even Santa likes you anymore, you simpering little nerd. Did I say that out loud?

6) If Santa EVER kicked me from his lap & down a slide in front of a store full of people, I’d find me a LARGE leg shaped lamp and shed some light on his situation. Ho-ho-ho bitch. Hard to sit on a lampshade, ain’t it?

I’m Out.

Wednesday, November 09, 2005

Feeling Happy.

Do you ever think of someone and it just makes you feel happy? I know you do.

This morning, I was thinking about my mom. Her name is Leona & she lives a long way away from me. This is how I feel when she's in my thoughts.

What else is there to say? Some things are better without words...

Love ya mom. Thanks for being the sunshine of my life. :)

Wednesday, November 02, 2005

Where's The Beef, Pt. 2

This is a response to my "Where's The Beef" blog that I received second hand the other day via e-mail. Its from a nice conservative lady who happens to be a friend of a friend. I felt it was worth posting to further illustrate the key arguments of my earlier post.

message begins...

Hi **** – First, isn’t this the guy who knows Dino Rossi? Maybe not, his name just rang a bell.

I read his blog. Although I generally found him to be refreshing, he does seem to be naive with respect to how politics actually work. In the second paragraph he indicated that although he votes for conservative candidates, he “counts on liberals to protect his liberties when given the power to do so”. Not! One of the many things liberals do that piss me off is that they use the judicial branch of government to impose social issues and moral values. They are supposed to interpret existing law – not write new law from the bench. A recent case in point is the New Hope, Connecticut case involving imminent domain. The local government (liberal) took the private property of an individual stating that the new owners would generate more tax revenue. Where did the court find that in existing law – they didn’t – they created it. That falls under his statement about government staying out of our pockets, etc. Liberal activism is a very real threat to us constitutionalists and is the last bastion for the loony left.

Another issue with which I disagree is his criticism of the two party system. He is being idealistic, but realistically, it takes the “machinery” of a large, established party to even get in the race. It would be wonderful if we could vote for Joe down the street because he’s really a cool dude, but besides you and Joe, nobody else will even know his name. Unfortunately, that’s just the way it works (not to mention the ton of money needed, which is one of the big advantages of having the “party” behind you). We have a very competent guy here in Oregon who has run for Governor, but recently changed to the Republican party – I assume because a Libertarian has no chance. I spoke to Kevin Mannix (our Republican Governor candidate) and he confirmed my assumption. You just can’t win a major race outside the two big parties.

Jason has a flair for writing – very colorful and it shows depth of thought.

You are more than welcomed to pass my email on to Jason and I would like to hear his response.

What follows is my response...

Although I agree with just about everything stated above in regards to political theory and practice, I must point out that yes, I realize that I am proselytizing from an ideal. However, idealism and naivety are not one and the same in my book. In fact I would have to say that idealism, or a hope for and belief in something better, is absolutely necessary in a free society. To dismiss desire for change as little more than pipe dreams of the naive and ignorant, simply because "that's just the way things are done around here" or because Goliath is just too darn big to challenge, is to stagnate and eventually lose ones liberty to subtle but steady erosion. You only lose when you stop trying.

The revolutionaries who fought for and founded this great country, by the above standard, would be considered the mental equivalent of a rock. How could they hope to win independence from the English hegemony when the vast majority of American settlers were still adamantly loyal to the crown? A fools errand at best, but fighting for an ideal that was vital to them led to the foundation of the worlds greatest nation, against all odds. Its very easy to simply deal with what is handed to you and convince yourself that this is as good as it gets. Its very difficult to continue hoping against hope that things can still change for the better, especially in light of the last several decades of American political overreach. To strive for an ideal against all odds, with conviction that you are on the side of good, is how a small group of people can eventually effect change in a world populated by the sedentary masses and the "leaders" who would exploit them.

Additionally, let me make it clear that I DO understand that the Libs in our country (as well as the Cons) are not living up to their "Image" and that that in itself is the problem. I desperately want to believe that the Libs really do want to fight to maintain civil liberties for all; I want them to do what they say they will do and fight for the issues that they claim to believe in. But they don't. They just want to get re-elected, at any cost, yes, even by destroying the checks and balances of our political structure. I speak of their perversion of the Judicial branch just as the above commenter has stated. Libs, are you truly the party of Social liberties? Do you remember fighting through the 50's & 60's for the rights of all to live as they choose? Cons, are you really the party of noble tradition & Economic liberty? Do you still fight the new deal plague and the resulting federal overreach? Are the needs of the American worker still foremost in your collective minds? I don't think so. I think power for powers sake is the rule of the day. Actions speak louder than words and pointing fingers and yelling louder does not convince. But at this juncture, one of you will get my vote. What choice do I have? (wink)

One final point. I understand that the political machine works relatively efficiently at its new task. Those who own it must benefit greatly. Just look, they keep getting re-elected. I once owned a lawn mower. Over time, it stopped doing what it was supposed to do, cut grass, and instead just made noise and looked dangerous and powerful. But the grass was barely cut. I had not maintained my mower well. So I had to buy a new one. The last couple of generations have not maintained the American political machine well, and although it still makes lots of noise and seems powerful, it has stopped doing what it was originally intended to do, that is to serve, truly serve, the people. No, it only serves well those who want a loud & powerful machine, just for the machines sake (power for the sake of power?). Sorry if we must disagree on this one, but "That's just the way it works" is not good enough for me. I want a new machine or at least new shiny parts for the old one. Unrealistic? Oh well, just call me an idealist. But at least I'm trying.

Thursday, October 27, 2005

Where's The Beef

When I was a kid, Wendy's had a great commercial featuring a little old lady questioning the burger content of her burger. She want's to know "Where's the Beef?". I mean, for Christs sake, she ordered a HAMBURGER so you would expect that the actual BURGER would make up the great majority of her HAMBURGER. I know how she feels. Its called truth in advertising.

Let me begin by defining myself politically, as if that is possible. Label me a Libertarian if you must, but let me state that I knew what that meant before it was little more than a fashion statement for "intelligent" social drop outs and hempfest trust fund babies. I vote primarily conservative fiscally and I vote primarily Liberal on social issues. That generally translates to voting for conservative politicians and voting liberal on most "issues". I believe in zero tolerance for government intrusion in my private life and have counted on liberals to protect my liberties when given the power to do so. I'm for small to nonexistent government and extremely low taxes and have counted on conservatives to shrink the federal government and its expenditures when given the power to do so. Translation: Hey Big Brother. Stay out of my wallet, my bedroom, & my children's heads. I agree to pay you to do one thing well and that is keep my country safe from aggression. Otherwise, stay away. We'll take care of the rest. Naive? Idealistic? Unrealistic you say. Perhaps, but not so unrealistic if our politicians would do what they say they will do. (Stop Laughing) But honestly, and I write this in as non-partisan a voice as I can muster, Where's The Beef?

Ok. I've exhausted that metaphor's usefulness. How about this one. If todays American politics were a school yard, the Republicans would be the simpering church nerds whining "Your not supposed to do that! If you don't stop that, God will get you and I'll help. But you still like me, right?" The Democrats on the other hand are some strange recombinant breed of know-it-all and bully, sneering "Fuck you and your morality. Now give me your money. I promise I'll share it. You can tell from my unnatural intelligence that you can trust me."

That leaves just us regular kids on the playground wondering what activities are still allowable, and if we'll have any after-tax money left to do those things. Sometimes I feel like our Federal Government views the populace as nothing more than a revenue generating commodity with an occasional vote. And they can buy that with a new social program. Wonderful. Spend more of my money. Hell yeah I'll vote for you!

I could go on. But suffice it to say that I'm somewhat concerned with some of the decisions made by our current President. And guess what, I voted for him twice and probably would again, given the same choices. Consider that we now have the biggest, most expensive government of all time, with the highest level of government intrusion in American history, all under a Fed that is literally controlled by Republicans. Hey guys, thanks for keeping your promise to shrink government and lower taxes. While your at it, how about writing a blank check to Louisiana to fix the recent hurricane damage. We all know how well they managed the money we sent them to PREPARE for one. But we as taxpayers understand that you REALLY CARE. Here's a vote. All the while, the Dems can only sit around and bitch and moan and sink into ineffectiveness. That is unless you equate obstructionism with effectiveness. But considering the alternative....

But I don't think this is a new thing. Our last President (and congress) was just as bad. We can thank the Clinton years for singlehandedly rendering our country vulnerable to outside aggressors (In my mind, resulting in 911) and at the same time confounding our collective national morality to the point that the question of right or wrong hinges on ones definition of the word "is". But there are a lot of women out there that must be very grateful because their husbands are no longer having "sexual relations" with other women. (You'll have to over look the lipstick rings ladies) All the while, the Republicans could only bitch and moan and sink into ineffectiveness and obstructionism. Do I sound jaded. Good. But disgusted is more like it. What happened to the American Utopian dream? Where are our liberties? They were hijacked by the politicians. Thanks fuckers.

That brings me to my final point. Abolish the two party system. Now. When one is forced to choose between two piece of shit parties, we will inevitably end up with a piece of shit government. And like I've always said, you can't polish a turd. We all get so caught up in which way our powerful government will decide on each and every polarizing issue that we forget to ask the real questions. How much power should we bestow upon our Fed? How much should we keep at state and local levels? What parts of American life should be completely outside the realm of any level of governance and what should be left to free market and individual choice? Our congress and president have concerned themselves with whether a person dying of cancer should smoke marijuana (Nope. That would be unhealthy.) They've agonized over such things as Baseball and gay love. Why? Because, like my mom always used to tell me, they've "gotten too big for their britches and need to be knocked down a peg or two."

This call goes out to all Americans.

Break the current system. Force change to happen. Deny the two parties their monopoly. Vote for anyone else! Fire the Fed! VOTE OUTSIDE THE BOX!

I'm out.

Wednesday, October 26, 2005

Coffee & Mist

Grey mornings and coffee, a few of my favorite things. This is the kind of late October morning that I find sort of sad and exhilarating at the same time, a chilly misty dreary day that foretells of winter on its way and reminds me of my ocean youth, the kind of morning that is rare in the high desert. I like it.

Mornings like this must appeal to some forgotten primal simian in me. An ancient paint-faced inhabitant of Wales or Scotland or some other cold dreary foggy place might feel right at home in Moses Lake on a morning like this. Well, except for the cars and stuff.

There is definitely a mystery behind the mist, especially on cold mornings and especially in October. Its like forgotten gods and monsters do battle behind the veil of fog, a swirling dampness pregnant with danger and excitement and the unknown. Everything is hinted at and nothing is quite real, faded to near white and just beyond our grasp. I am just a glorified cave man on days like this, suspicious of the gray outside but safe in my cave. With coffee.

I'm looking forward to this weekend. My little brother is visiting from Portland and we always have a great time together. I miss him all the time, so it will be good to see him. Plus I will be taking him to our local Haunted House to scare hell out of him Saturday night. They do a good job every year. If I'm lucky, he will crap himself so I can make fun. Brothers are great for humiliation. I miss him all the time.